Caught in the Middle
by onemorehandmedown
Summary: It was almost as if the place had been made specifically for him – a place of pain and loneliness." Dean's POV after the season 3 finale. AU, most of it written before I had seen any of season four but could perhaps be considered spoilery for 4.01.


Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural, that would be Kripke and co.

A/N: I wrote most of this before I had seen any of season four. The ending of this could possible be construed as a spoiler for 4:01 but other than that if you've seen up to the end of season 3 you'll be right.

**Caught in the Middle**

"SAM!!!"

Dean screamed his brother's name over and over until his voice was hoarse. It was a futile effort of course – after all he was in hell. Sam wouldn't even be able to hear him, much less respond.

He closed his eyes, trying to block out the excruciating pain that surrounded him by focusing on Sam's face. Sam might not have realised it but in the last few weeks of his life Dean had spent a lot of time looking at him, etching his brother's face in his memory. Preparing for the time when memories were all he'd have left of the man who had been his world.

Dean looked around. All he could see was chains stretching off in all directions like some hideous, oversized spider web. Otherwise there was nothing – the chains appeared to exist in a dark void. Dean was alone, suspended by several of these chains and gasping with pain as they channelled excruciatingly painful electric shocks through his body. It was almost as if the place had been made specifically for him – a place of pain and loneliness.

He was a little surprised that his soul appeared to be in one piece. Dean had been bleeding and broken inside ever since he could remember. He'd wondered more than once in the past year if he'd arrive in hell as just so much dust – broken into so many tiny little pieces that even the demons would have no use for him and just sweep him up in a dustpan and throw him away. Apparently his soul was far more intact than he'd thought. He smiled sadly; that was probably Sam's doing.

There was no-one Dean had loved quite as much as Sam. Sure, he'd loved his father but his father had never been free with emotions. The man had been more a drill sergeant than a father and sometimes Dean still wondered if John had loved him in return. He knew Sam had. Then there was Bobby, who had been like a father to Dean. Dean supposed that the way he felt about Bobby would qualify as love but it was nowhere near as strong as what he felt for Sam. Ever since he'd carried his baby brother from the house on the night of the fire Sam had been Dean's world.

Since the fire there had been little stability. Home had been whatever cheap, crappy accommodation was on offer wherever the endless hunt for Yellow Eyes had taken their father this time, he'd attended more schools than he cared to count and fobbed off even more social workers. Dad was hardly ever around, leaving them with various friends or, more often, alone while he hunted. The only constant, apart from change, was Sam.

"Watch out for Sammy." Dean had lost count of the number of times his father had told him that. He'd never really needed to be told. John insisted on telling him anyway, only reinforcing Dean's belief that Sam was much more important than he himself was. After all, if Dean was important why was there generally no-one to look out for him?

It was only in the last few months that Dean had even started to understand that, in Sam's eyes at least, he had immense value. He still found that concept difficult to comprehend. In his own eyes Dean's life had never held much value, except as Sam's protector.

Was this going to be his eternity? Or was it just the beginning? After all, that last demon he and Sam had exorcised when they were trying to find out who held his contract had mentioned that there were demons down here that were just waiting to get their hands on him.

Although, now he thought about it, Dean wasn't even sure demons had hands when they weren't possessing some hapless human. Oh well, it was probably only a matter of time before he found out anyway. Surely they wouldn't just leave him here in this void when they could be torturing him in person? Or should that be in demon? Dean wasn't quite sure.

Then again, why would they bother when he was already torturing himself with miserable thoughts and irritating drivel?

Dean howled with pain as the largest lightning bolt yet lanced through him. Clearly he was going to have to revise his pain scale. The new one would start somewhere around a million and end at infinity plus one. No wonder demons worked so hard to get out of here.

***

Dean was wondering exactly how long he'd been there (it felt like he'd been there an eternity but clearly he hadn't) when the first of the blazing spears dropped from the sky. It hit him in the chest, cutting clean through his body, and he felt his mouth fill with blood. The wound healed just in time for five more to hit him, opening wounds all over his body and he wished he was able to black out. But they kept coming and he was awake to feel every bit of the pain they inflicted.

He was so consumed with pain that it took a moment for Dean to notice when the spears suddenly stopped hitting him. They were still falling from the sky, but about a metre away from his body they seemed to hit an invisible barrier. The same barrier also seemed to be blocking the lightning, so that the only pain came from the hooks through his skin that held him suspended. He tensed and looked around warily, not understanding why he should be given a reprieve and suspecting that he would pay dearly for it.

"Relax Dean, there's no need to be afraid."

The voice was deep and male with a hint of an accent that Dean couldn't identify. Following the voice Dean looked to his left and saw someone standing beside him (standing on what?), a young man around his own age. At least he appeared to be a young man but there was something about him that made Dean suspect otherwise. He was tall, almost as tall as Sam, with close cropped black hair and large eyes that were a strange clear, pale green flecked with silver set in a face with high cheekbones, full lips and a well proportioned nose. His clothes were not unlike what Dean often wore himself – jeans, biker boots and a white t-shirt (Dean probably would have chosen black) – and his entire body seemed to be suffused by a pale glow.

"Who are you?"

"My name is Camael and I am an angel…" He seemed to be intending to continue but Dean cut him off.

"Yeah, and I just saw a pig fly out of your ass." It must be the demons screwing with his head, Dean thought. There was no way an angel would come for him was there?

The angel gave him such a Sam-like look that for a moment Dean could have sworn it was his brother standing next to him. What was this…thing (he refused to call it an angel) doing wearing Sammy's patented bitchface? Had it paid for the privilege?

He was jolted from his latest line of drivel by Camael's voice.

"You may have difficulty believing me Dean, but either way I am an angel."

"Fine, let's say you are an angel. What are you doing here? I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't angels supposed to live in heaven?"

"I have come to take you away from here. Now can we stop talking about me? I was hoping to discuss you."

"Go right ahead." Dean still wasn't sure if he believed the strange being before him but there was no harm in listening to it was there? After all he had an eternity, literally.

"You're not supposed to be here Dean."

"You mean, even if I hadn't made that deal I wasn't already headed to hell in a handbasket?"

"Dean, I won't lie to you. You're not exactly white as the driven snow but then, none of you humans are. But you were never meant to go to hell and you're not meant to be here."

Dean was confused. "Wait, are you saying this isn't Hell? Because it sure feels like it."

"Believe me, Hell is a million times worse. This is Limbo and you're here because Lilith and her minions overlooked something very important about you."

Dean snorted. "Something important? About me? You must have the wrong guy."

Camael sighed sadly. "Dean, you are not worthless. You never were. Sam isn't the only one with a destiny. Without you, the coming war will be won by the demons. It is your destiny Dean, and Sam's too, to fight against them and ultimately send them back to hell."

"But I thought Sam's destiny was tied up with Azazel."

"Azazel sensed Sam's potential and wanted to use him for his own ends. He never knew Sam's true destiny, never realised that Sam's gifts weren't the result of his meddling. Even had Sam been the last one standing after his little contest, Azazel never would have been able to turn him."

"Ok, so Azazel was deluded."

"That pretty much sums it up, yes. Sam was marked long before Azazel thought of using him in his little plan for world domination and his destiny is tied inextricably to yours."

"So, you're telling me that I'm somehow special and that's why I'm in Limbo?" Dean was intrigued, but couldn't help suspecting that this was some demonic joke intended to get his hopes up only to send them crashing down again.

"Not quite. The main reason that you are in Limbo rather than Hell is because of your link to Sam."

"I don't understand."

"Dean, how do you feel about your brother?"

"What kind of stupid question is that?" Dean responded incredulously. "I sold my soul for him, doesn't that give you some idea how I feel about him?"

Camael sighed. "Let me make this easy for you. If I was to say that you love Sam, I mean really love Sam more than anything in life, would you agree with me?"

"Yes."

"Would it surprise you if I said that Sam feels just the same way about you?"

"What would you know? It's not as if you were around offering your help when I was alive!"

"Dean, I am the archangel of pure love, so I know quite a bit about the subject. And I suggest you drop the bitterness – it doesn't become you."

"So Sam loves me. Will you please get to the point?"

"Sam loves you just as fiercely as you love him and it is because of the strength of your love for each other that the two of you have become bound to each other at the very deepest level of your souls. It is a bond so strong that it cannot be broken by any other than God and He chooses not to. You are in Limbo because your soul cannot move on while Sam still lives. Even if he died right this second he would only join you here because having made no deals Hell has no claim to him and you cannot follow him into the hereafter whilst it has a claim to you."

Dean just stared.

"It's a lot to take in, isn't it? I don't expect you to believe me straight away Dean. Right now I'm willing to settle for a little trust, a little faith, so I can get you out of here."

Camael's tone was gentle and Dean found himself wanting to trust the angel. Even if it turned out to be a trick, it wasn't as though his situation could get any worse, right?

"What do I have to do?"

Camael knelt and placed a hand on Dean's shoulder. "Just have faith."

The light was blinding, but at least he wasn't in pain anymore. In the arms of the angel Dean Winchester re-entered the land of the living.

* * *

Thanks for reading! Reviews are appreciated.


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